"Then why is it a travesty?" You're asking. Well, these weren't just flannel sheets. They were flannel robot sheets. Vaguely like this rug. Well exactly like this rug, only sheets, and on a lighter blue.
And I know as an adult I should learn to have sheets for adults, but I'm single. I don't have a roommate. I have a twin bed. So losing the robot sheets was a real blow to my sense of security.
So Saturday afternoon my mom and I went to anywhere we could think of. I had already conquered the internet shopping experience. Marshalls (where I originally purchased the sheets), T.J. Maxx, Target, Macy's, Penneys, Bed Bath and Beyond, Gordmans. We started at Target and ended at Target. I reluctantly went back into the store and bought white sheets with dinosaurs on them. Cotton sheets. Not flannel to better keep me warm in the apartment I refuse to heat. Cotton. Not robots. Dinosaurs. Don't get me wrong. I love me some dinosaurs. Jurassic Park is in my top 10. But they aren't my robots.
Plus! They mix dinosaurs with dino bones. Well, dino skulls. Which I feel is just cruel to the dinosaurs.
"Behold your future," said the sheet to itself.